When I decided to be the birth coach for a stranger, little did I know it would result in two daughters….
The following is the synopsis of my memoir, Born in My Heart: A Bittersweet Adoption Blessing.
Six years ago I was asked to be the birth coach for a woman (Ruth*) I didn’t know. Her husband (David) was in prison and her daughter, Payton in CPS custody. Ruth was an addict and she had no one for support.
I chose to help out and witnessed the birth of a baby girl, Paige. I cut her umbilical cord, held her… and fell completely in love!
Ruth had nowhere to recover from her C-section so my husband and I let her stay with us for almost a week. I learned about the person under the addiction during that time; I came to understand firsthand “hate the sin, not the sinner.”
Paige was placed in foster care because of severe drug withdrawal. Ruth decided to place her for adoption as she knew taking care of only one child on her own would be difficult enough. Ruth gave us her blessing to adopt Paige.
I attended all the court hearings and got to know Ruth even more during the legal process. I directly witnessed the conflicting emotions a biological mother** feels when she selflessly does what is in her child’s best interest.
A year later Payton reunified with Ruth. She was removed again six months later when Ruth and David stopped meeting county requirements. This time Payton was removed permanently. We took Payton into our home just before she turned three, and adopted her a year later.
This is the story of my girls’ adoption with their unique needs, my unusual relationship with Ruth, and the good, the bad and the ugly of it all from my uncensored point of view.
I believe people need to be educated about the dire need for foster and foster-adopt homes. I believe people need to learn about addiction and how it affects both the addict and the people in the addict’s life. That is why I am taking steps to publish my story the traditional route.
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* Names have been changed
* Discussion in another blog about why I use the term “biological” instead of “birth”